Disclaimer: Characters, situations, and everything else belong to 
Chris Carter, 10-13 and Fox, not me, no infringement is intended by 
this use.

Notes: This story comes from a difference in opinion that Mystic and 
I have.  Gotta love that Chris Carter, his vagueness sometimes leaves 
the field open for many interpretations.  So, much as I loved "Missy 
and the Rat" I had to write my own story, which is sort of its 
counterpoint.  I'm exploring some ideas I had about certain events in 
"One Breath" and "Blessing Way" and also about why Scully drifted 
away from the church six years ago as she said in "Revelations".  Let 
me know how I do.

_______________________
Your Protector
by eponine119 
eponine119@att.net
October 4, 1996
________________________

She stood in the quiet of the hospital room and listened to machines 
pump air in and out of her sister's lungs.  The sound was harsh and 
raspy, like someone old, someone who was suffering.

She looked at her sister.  She wasn't suffering.  Not now, not that 
she could feel anyway.  Her body was traumatized and her brain had 
closed itself off protectively.  Coma.  The body's defense from harm. 
 Except that sometimes, even your protector could kill you.

She hadn't seen her sister in five years.  Not when she graduated 
medical school.  Not when their mother called her and asked her to 
come home, to talk sense to her little sister.  Not when her father 
ordered her to.  Not when her brother got married, and not when their 
father died.

Five long years.

She'd changed.  More than Dana would ever know.

XxXxX

She found her mind wandering back, to times better forgotten, as she 
sat in the darkened car.  Her mind was too idle if it was receptive 
to these thoughts.  But now, tonight, she just couldn't shake them.  
They clung to her like the chill of the cold November night.

She'd been young then, five years ago.  Trapped in a situation she 
couldn't charm her way out of.  For the first time, she'd needed help.
  And turned to her little sister, not only her best friend, but 
practically a doctor.

What a mistake that had been.

"Damn it, Missy, how could you be so stupid?" Dana had demanded of 
her.  The night was dark and cold and only added to Melissa's uneasy 
feeling.  Clammy tears stained her cheeks over coffee brewed on a hot 
plate in Dana's tiny student apartment.

"I loved him, Dana.  I didn't know this was going to happen.  And I'm 
not ready for it, I can't do this by myself."

Dana just shook her head and Melissa knew she was fighting to hold 
back angry words.  "Why are you here claiming you need advice, then?" 
she asked, pursing her lips into the pout that their father had 
always been unable to resist.  "Your mind is already made up."

"You're right," Melissa said, hurt and angry.  They were sisters, 
they were supposed to support each other.  No matter what.  Dana 
wasn't supposed to be such a spoiled little brat about it, she 
thought bitterly, What would she know about being in trouble?  She 
got to her feet, feeling sick and shaking with rage.

"Melissa," Dana said, her tone cold, but calling her back 
nevertheless.

She turned, daring to hope that their bond as sisters was strong 
enough to survive this. They'd just barely grown old enough to 
overcome most of their childish squabbles.  She waited.

"It's murder," Dana said.

Melissa flinched inwardly, but outside she was just as cool as her 
sister.  She nodded once, simply, furious, and turned again to go.

Thin fingers grasped her wrist.  Blindly she yanked her arm away, but 
Dana held her fast.  She turned and glared, and saw Dana scribbling a 
name and a phone number on a scrap of paper from the notes she'd been 
studying for exams.  "He'll take care of you."  Melissa didn't want 
to take the paper, but she felt herself fold it up and shove it deep 
into her pocket.  "But this doesn't mean I approve."

"Someday you'll grow up and realize there's a hell of a lot more to 
life than your narrow minded Catholic beliefs, little sis.  There's a 
whole world out there for you to see.  If you dare," she had to get 
her dig in.

"Seems like you've already seen most of it, and all it's gotten you 
is knocked up," Dana retorted, just as mean, but her inflection was 
flat.  Melissa had never seen her sister so calm or so controlled.  
She's changed, when did that happen? she wondered.

"I hope someday you grow up, Starbuck."  She saw the pain and instant 
tears of hurt that flashed through her sister's eyes as she threw the 
nickname, a sign of Dana's favor and Melissa's own exile, into her 
sister's face.  They both knew who had been the favorite and who had 
never quite measured up.  "We're all damned.  Your little gold cross 
and confession every Saturday aren't going to save your soul."

Dana hadn't said anything at all, just touched the cross she wore 
around her neck self consciously and held Melissa's eyes for a long 
moment before she opened her book again.  Quietly, Melissa let 
herself out.

She'd gone to Dana's friend, who offered to do the abortion for free, 
as a favor to Dana.  Melissa insisted on paying, but it hadn't done 
her much good.  Internal bleeding put her in a coma for three days 
afterward.  She had almost died and she would never have children.  
Her father had almost had a coronary right then and there, when he 
found out.  Their mother, fighting to understand, told her when she 
woke that Dana hadn't left her side the entire time.

That was why she was here now, after five years, Melissa thought, 
shifting in the driver's seat of the car.  She owed Dana a return of 
the favor.

She checked her watch. Eight fifteen.  Just about time.  She turned 
her gaze to the window across the street and jumped as she saw 
movement in the darkened apartment.  He wasn't supposed to be there!  
He'd booked a flight, he was supposed to be all the way out of 
Washington by now.

"Damn it," Melissa muttered, grabbing her cell phone and dialing 
quickly.  "You've got to wait," she ordered, "He's in there."

"He isn't."

"He is, I just saw him.  If you go in there, you're going to have to 
kill him.  And if you do, you know you don't see another sunrise."

"But - "

"Someone must have warned him.  Just wait, and let me take care of 
this."  She disconnected from the call, and ran her hands through her 
hair quickly.  She'd have to lure him out herself.

For a moment, she was reminded of the spying games she and Dana had 
played for hours in their backyard one summer when they were ten and 
nine.  The next summer, they'd moved to a different base, and they'd 
tried to play the games again but something had changed.

Looks like Dana wasn't the only one with spying in her heart, Melissa 
thought as she got out of the car and started for Mulder's apartment.


XxXxX

They were testing her loyalty.  She knew it.  She also knew that 
there was no way she could fail.  If she did, or if she tried to back 
out, she would be dead.

And when it came down to it, she would do anything, kill anyone she 
had to, to stay alive.

She'd seen things in the last year, and done things, and had things 
done to her.  Unspeakable things.  Designed to break her body, her 
mind, her will.  She'd gotten through them all.  She was strong.  It 
all came from inside, from meditation, concentration.  New Age crap, 
she heard that a lot, but building up your strength and endurance 
from your mind made a lot more sense to her than putting all your 
faith in a God she'd never witnessed any proof of.  Better to have 
faith in herself.  In her senses and instincts and abilities.

See if your God protects you now, she thought, trying to focus on the 
bad, trying not to let any of the good filter through into her mind.  
Trouble was, there was so much good to remember.  Her knees trembled 
as she got out of the car, touching the open zipper of her handbag 
just to make sure.  

With every step, Melissa was certain she would turn back.  She tried 
to make a plan.  She could run, change her name, get plastic surgery. 
 Anything.  She could face whatever torture they offered, just as 
long as she didn't have to do this.  This hurt like nothing else did.


But she knew these men would find her.  And it wouldn't be pleasant 
when they did.

She wouldn't get a mile from the scene.  They were testing her, so 
she knew there were operatives nearby.  Watching her and waiting.  If 
she made a break for it, the deed would still be done.

Her mind worked furiously and her palms began to sweat as she 
approached the building.  She was certain she was going to drop her 
key.  Maybe she could get out of it, she thought again.  There was 
one man who might be able to help her.  He was good, and he'd spoken 
of wanting to get out himself.  Maybe if they went together, they'd 
be safe.  She could watch Alex's back and he could watch hers.

Of all the bastards in the organization, he was the only one she 
trusted.  He reminded her of someone she'd cared about long ago.  
There was something in his green eyes, no matter how desperate, 
telling her that he really cared.

She'd hesitated too long, she realized, blinking and seeing the door 
in front of her as though for the first time.  She was probably off 
schedule.  And that was bad.

If she wanted to escape, she'd have to make them think that 
everything was all right.  That she was going to do it.

Even though, remembering all of their good times, all of their 
childhood together, Melissa didn't think she could kill her sister.

But as she turned the key in the lock, she wasn't so certain any more.
  She didn't want to die.  Please, God, forgive me, she thought, and 
opened the door.

XxXxX
The End.

It always strikes me as weird to dedicate stories to people who will 
never read them, and this may seem a weird one to do it on, but it 
feels right.  This is dedicated to my sis.

Any comments on the story are gratefully accepted at zzcf89a@prodigy.
com  Thanks for reading!

__________________________________________________________________________